Holly Heights | Mailbox

[strawberrysorbae]

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Comments

[aomeanie]

It's... nothing. [except it's totally something.]

[strawberrysorbae]

[she pulls him into a headlock.] What's. Bugging. You.

[aomeanie]

Ah-- Jesus!! I give, I give! [he flails his arms around.] Fine, are we gonna talk about what happened the other day with Kise?

[strawberrysorbae]

[she lets him go, and kisses the back of his neck in apology for the rough treatment. at his words, though, she visibly blanches.] I...think we probably should. I don't even know where to start, though.

[aomeanie]

I don't either. [which is why he skirted around the topic for a little.]

[strawberrysorbae]

Okay, then. [she shifts around until she can sit up properly and look at him.] Why did you kiss Kichan?

[aomeanie]

I don't know? I just... I had the urge to kiss him, and every time I looked at him I couldn't control the urge??

[strawberrysorbae]

[she nods in agreement.] I felt the same way. It was like I couldn't help myself. I was relieved that it affected you too, though, because I really didn't want you to get mad or break up with me because of it. [a pause.] You...don't want to break up with me because of it, do you?

[aomeanie]

[he shakes his head.] No, of course I don't! I'm just... I don't know I feel really confused right now?

[strawberrysorbae]

Do you think that you...like Kichan, in that way?

[aomeanie]

[he runs his hands through his hair and tugs it slightly.] I... I don't know? I mean I like him as a friend, yeah? But... [he grumbles]

[strawberrysorbae]

[she leans a little closer.] Do you want to kiss him again? Do you think you'd like it?

[aomeanie]

[his nose scrunches a bit.] I don't know.... I mean it was different kissing him than what it usually feels like when I kiss you? But it was a good different. That's... that's not weird is it?

[strawberrysorbae]

I don't think that's weird at all. [she nuzzles him affectionately.] Kissing him was a different kind of good than kissing you is. You're different people, after all, and the way I feel about you both is different too!

[aomeanie]

[he looks up at her.] What about you?

[strawberrysorbae]

Eh? What about me?

[aomeanie]

Do you want to kiss him again too.

[that moment when you almost write kill him..... whoops]

[strawberrysorbae]

I do. I think I'd like it a lot. But I don't...I don't want to lose you over this, Daichan. [she knows how territorial he is.] I won't do it again if you don't want me to, and I won't be mad or unhappy.

[aomeanie]

So... do you like him? [trying to be lowkey casual about it. let's see how well that works]

[strawberrysorbae]

[oh god. she has to swallow a few times to speak past the lump in her throat.]

I'm polyamorous. That means I can be in love with more than one person at a time. My feelings towards every person are very different, and I don't care about two people the same way. [a deep breath.] I like him. And I love you. Seeing you two together...made me happy, not jealous. But Daichan, I started dating you knowing that you probably weren't like me. I'm okay and happy with it just being the two of us. Don't feel like you have to make a decision just because I feel a certain way.

[aomeanie]

[he nods slowly as he slumps back on the bed. he runs his hands up his face and rubs at his eyes a little.] This is just... it's all happening too quickly all at once.

[strawberrysorbae]

[ugh she's going to cry, she's so nervous. this is why she never brought this up before.] We don't have to make any decisions right away. I'm sorry to spring all this on you so suddenly. I just...just remember I love you, okay? I love you so much, Daiki, and I'll respect whatever you want to do.

[aomeanie]

No it's not that. [he still keeps his hands over his eyes though.] I think I might have.... I don't know, enjoyed kissing him as well? And I wouldn't mind doing it again, but that just.... confuses me even more? Because I've always felt like I was a one s.o. kind of person? So the fact that I want to do it again confuses the hell out of me because this is so new and it's all happening too quickly.

[strawberrysorbae]

[oh okay thank fucking god, her stomach unknots a little at his words.] Does it bother you at all that he's another guy? [honestly she was expecting more gay crisis.] But I understand, it...it really freaked me out, when I first started to realize these things about myself. I thought no one would want to be with me, that they'd think that I was greedy to like more than one person, or that I didn't think they were enough for me.

[aomeanie]

I guess so? I haven't really thought about guys like that since, well... you know. [he has a healthy obsession with boobs for a reason.] For what it's worth though, I don't find you greedy? You just have more love to give, I guess.